AILSA CHANG, HOST:
Patty Griffin's new album, "Crown Of Roses," is built around the power of women's stories, especially the story of one woman - Griffin's mother, Lorraine, whose wedding portrait graces the album cover. Lorraine's hair is neatly pinned with a crown of roses, and her lips tease you with an ever-so-slight Mona Lisa smile.
PATTY GRIFFIN: My mom had a great way of smiling, and we that know her can kind of tell the difference if it's a real smile or a fake smile. She looks kind of, you know, sweet there, but it's not entirely pure (laughter).
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "BACK AT THE START")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) There's secrets I don't tell ever to myself. I just keep moving.
CHANG: Patty Griffin's mother died earlier this year, and she says a distance had formed between them over much of her life.
GRIFFIN: I mean, she was always busy because she had a lot of kids - you know, seven kids in seven years. And we just sort of kept drifting, to the point where it was just easier for me to just drift away than deal with it.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "BACK AT THE START")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) Your heart. You might lose everything, spend years in the dark. But it isn't the end. You're just back at the start.
CHANG: But in the last decade or so, Griffin did deal with it. She committed to deepening her relationship with her mom. And I asked her, what was it exactly that motivated her to do that?
GRIFFIN: There was a moment right after my dad died. I was the only one that could really hang out with her in her house. After his funeral, I was the one who stayed with her, and she looked a little disappointed (laughter).
CHANG: Oh, that it was you instead of one of the other six children?
(LAUGHTER)
GRIFFIN: You know, I was like - and fair enough, you know? Fair enough, right? So...
CHANG: Oh, really? Yeah?
GRIFFIN: Yeah. Oh, I think so. It's fair. But, you know, I hadn't put the time in for quite a while. And I didn't - and I realized I didn't know her. My mom had, you know, all the reasons that a woman can have for being angry, on top of being really overwhelmed with a family that grew very fast, and no real budget for that. You know, she was really a genius at making all of it work, but it was like spinning a hundred plates at the same time for her.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "WAY UP TO THE SKY")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) It was a hard time. It was a long line. It was a steep climb with too many kids to handle. She got her kids raised and her nerves frayed, as her life blazed through her eyes made out of candles.
And at a certain point, you know, everybody falls down on the job, and she did. And I think that there was a lot of - she had a lot of shame around that and a lot of anger that went right along with it. So there was never, like, a moment where you could really get in a conversation with her about it without them coming at the same time (laughter). And..
CHANG: Oh, yeah.
GRIFFIN: ...It was very...
CHANG: Yeah.
GRIFFIN: ...Hard to, you know, sort that. But I had a lot more of an opening, I think, towards the end to listen and really just be prepared to try to heal it and not put myself in there and ask for that back.
CHANG: And did you get there? Did you get to the place you wanted to before you both had to say goodbye?
GRIFFIN: I really did.
CHANG: Good. Yeah.
GRIFFIN: I really did. I found out that she was actually very playful and funny and super smart, and all these things that I had missed.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "WAY UP TO THE SKY")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) In comes the hard freeze, early this year. How did she end up here? She can't remember.
CHANG: So I know about 10 years ago - around the same time that you were starting to get closer to your mom - you were battling a long-term respiratory infection on tour, right? And then you were diagnosed with breast cancer, which you overcame. Can I just ask, how are you feeling today, by the way?
GRIFFIN: I feel really good.
CHANG: Good.
GRIFFIN: I haven't - no signs of that returning...
CHANG: Good.
GRIFFIN: ...For a while, so that's good.
CHANG: But you have talked openly about how hard those health battles were and how they affected your voice, how you had to sort of...
GRIFFIN: Yeah.
CHANG: ...Rediscover how to use your own voice.
GRIFFIN: Yeah.
CHANG: What was that like, to learn how to use and find your voice physically, literally, again?
GRIFFIN: It was really, really humbling (laughter)...
CHANG: Yeah.
GRIFFIN: ...And very painful emotionally. You know, I think for a singer, you know, your instrument is in your body. And so when it - your body is, you know, not functioning the way you have sort of spent years teaching it to function, it's an identity crisis that is kind of off the charts.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "THE END")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) So I swallow my pride, like a big butterfly floating around and inside of my chest. Ooh, yeah.
It's taking me a little while to sort of strengthen it so that I can use it in a way that gives me pleasure again. And I feel like on this record, I'm starting to get back around to that.
CHANG: Well, I just want to tell you, your singing on this album - it is so beautiful.
GRIFFIN: Oh, thank you.
CHANG: I have been playing it nonstop. It's strong and gentle and gritty, all at the same time.
GRIFFIN: Oh, thank you.
CHANG: I can hear you feeling every word.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "I KNOW A WAY")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) Sometimes you feel like a fool to try and try again.
CHANG: Do you feel like at this point you have regained what you lost in your voice?
GRIFFIN: I haven't regained anything. I've gained something, but it's very different from what I had before. And - to me, it is. Might not sound like that to others, but it's definitely - it's a different field.
CHANG: Yeah?
GRIFFIN: And if you're an athletic - really athletic singer, you can start depending on that when you're feeling a little raw. You get up on stage, and you just do something really athletic. It's like juggling (laughter), you know?
CHANG: Yeah.
GRIFFIN: And look what I just did with all those notes (laughter).
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "I KNOW A WAY")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) I know a way, yeah. I heard of a way, yeah. I know a way that we can get over, over, over.
And I think losing that ability to sort of access that stuff easily has really - it was a process that happened over actually a few records. I had to start learning how to find my true voice again.
CHANG: So you feel you do have your true voice back, even though it's a different field, to use your words.
GRIFFIN: Yeah. It's coming...
CHANG: It's you.
GRIFFIN: It's coming there. Yeah.
CHANG: Yeah.
GRIFFIN: I think it's, like, a process, you know...
CHANG: Yeah.
GRIFFIN: ...And will probably remain that.
CHANG: Well, what you have now is absolutely gorgeous, Patty.
GRIFFIN: Thank you. Thank you so much.
CHANG: Patty Griffin's new album is called "Crown Of Roses." Thank you so much for spending this time with me, Patty. I so enjoyed this.
GRIFFIN: Thank you. I - me too. Thank you. So nice to talk to you.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "ALL THE WAY HOME")
GRIFFIN: (Singing) All the way home. All the way home. Did someone sing all the way home? He rode... Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.
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